Priceless


Priceless 


I look in the mirror 
And want so badly not to fear
The reflection that stares 
Wholly knowing, wholly aware
That I am not in awe

My nose is too big and the bridge has a bump
My torso is ample, accented with a lump
And I know I need to breathe in the air
And I know my organs live there
But I only see necessity through hate-colored lenses

My skin is spotted, red and angry
My wardrobe feels cheap and lazy
And I know these don't matter
And I know looks aren't an important factor
In what makes a person worth loving

My screens are filled with those quite bewitching
My books are characterized in looks only worth wishing
And I know it's not real
I know it's not real
But it feels real

When an ideal is impossible to reach
And the pain of realization is suddenly unleashed 
It can feel like a flood 
And hurt down to the blood
Hurt down to the soul

I am told to find beauty within myself
Or in Greek statues with figures no longer upheld
I am told that art is unique 
That walking the beaten path is weak
But I want to walk on trodden leaves

I want to wander into a world
When beauty is within my hold
Where I don't have to work for desire
Where compliments are all inspired
I don't want to be priceless
I just want to be seen

I want to be had
I want to be held
I want to feel 
I want to be
But I am not free

I have not escaped the cage of society
I still let standards silence me
Try as I may
I can't walk away
From the pain thrust upon me

I carry it on my face 
I carry it in my body
I carry it in my soul
I carry it in me
But I want to be free

I want to be free
And I want to fly 
I want to smile at people passing by
And I want to feel seen

I don't want to be priceless and unattainable 
I just want to be happy with me
And happy that I am free
Because I deserve to be

- Sam Rose

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